Saturday, February 9, 2013

Finally its over..

3 years relationship with him finally over.. All our dreams totally over now.. Remembering those promises we made make my heart hurt so much. Seeing his present make my heart hurt. Of course these 3 years we have made such a good relationship. 3 years. What a long time..

The weird part of it I’m not crying over him.. Weird huh? Suppose when this come out, whether the girl or the guy will cry over. I think we both not cry over these things. This is not good. Supposedly in this situation, I should cry like typical girl. But then I’m at that particular time just felt confused. I don’t know what to do, what am I suppose to feel. Yah may be because I’ve been lonely and being ignored by him made me feel like that. Also may be because of my principle not to love someone 100% until that man become my husband. Somehow I feel glad that I did hold that principle.

Another reason I believe is because I’ve been cried over and over during my time at u. I’ve been hurt so many times for more than one year because of my special friend. That one friend that I love like she is part of my family. That one friend that I can’t say no when she need my help and I’ll do without hesitated. That one friend that I cannot believe turned me out like this. Because of her, I always crying like I was about losing my family. Indeed, I’ve lost her as my family. Since that, I keep thinking how to built up my strength, how to find motivation. With the help of my friends, my close friends that indeed still with me and accept me the way I am, I finally recovered . Recovered from emotional diseases. I’ve become more calm, stronger, not easily cry over little things and so on. Somehow, this is what its called “ Ade hikmah disbalik sesuatu”.. aminn..

Now, I’ve to move on. Have to realize that there is no more man that will accompany me. Share my happy and sad story. hmm life still not over.. I’ve to forget himmm…